Numb

I don’t really know what is happening to me. This is not me over analyzing like I usually do. I just don’t feel right now, if that makes any sense. I’m numb. Numb to everyone. Numb to my parents lives, numb to my friends (although I do hang out with them often), numb to my sister and her new boyfriend, just numb. I’m sure others have gone through this same feeling. It’s just weird because of how I got here. I’ve never had the experiences before and they hurt. More than ever I don’t care. And that is not right. I know me, and caring is what I do. I’m not tooting my own horn but caring is what I was made to do. I feel numb to the outside world. Everything I am doing. And that’s what’s weird. I am doing but I am not feeling. Not being pulled in one direction, not wanting to move anywhere. Stuck. Stuck and numb.

It’s not a good combination.